Is Divorce OK?

by Dr. David Belk on November 16th, 2011

IS DIVORCE OK?

Without question the Bible clearly teaches God has a high standard for marriage and we should hold it in such regard.

• Marriage results in oneness. (Matthew 19:6)
• Marriage is to be permanent. (Matthew 19:6 & 1 Corinthians 7:27)
• Marriage is between one man and one woman. (Matthew 19:4-5 & Genesis 2:18-25)
• Same sex relationships/marriage/unions are forbidden. (Romans 1:24-27 &  1 Corinthians 6:9-11)
• Marriage is to be a picture of Christ and His Bride, the Church. (Ephesians 5:25-30)
• Marriage is God’s tool for husband and wife to grow in holiness. (Ephesians 5:22-23)

Regretfully some marriages end in divorce. The issue of divorce and remarriage from a biblical perspective has been long debated by theologians, scholars, and Christians throughout the centuries. The true questions about divorce usually center on the aspect of remarriage.

Biblical grounds for remarriage:

• Divorce and remarriage to the same person.
• When the marriage and divorce occurred prior to conversion.  (2 Corinthians 5:17 & Ephesians 2:1-9)
• Divorced and the former spouse has died. (1 Corinthians 7:9 & 39)
• Divorce occurred to adultery releasing the other spouse. (Matthew 5:31-32)
• Divorced and the former spouse has remarried. The former spouse’s new marriage would then constitute adultery releasing the other spouse. (Matthew 5:32 &  Deuteronomy 24:1-4)
• Divorce occurred due to the abandonment by an unbelieving spouse.  (1 Corinthians 7:12-15)

(Consider a pattern of physical abuse that endangers the spouse or children in the home to be an abandonment of the role of the spouse.)

Advice to those single without scriptural basis listed above:

• Trust God with you singleness and serve Him will all of your heart. (1 Corinthians 7:32-35)
• Stay single until former spouse dies, remarries, or reconciles with you.
• Ask God for sustaining grace.

Advice to those who are remarried after a divorce without scriptural basis listed above:

• Confess to the Lord and others who would be appropriate.
• Allow God to be the center of your marriage, following Him closely. Truly commit for this marriage to be ‘until death do us part’.
• Ask God for second marriage grace.

Advice to divorced parents:

• Be proactive in allowing children to ask questions for the rest of their lives. The door you and your spouse closed will be open for the rest of your children’s lives.
• Don’t bash the other spouse but be honest (as appropriate to their age) as to the problems.
• Keep children in places of spiritual growth and good friendship circles.
• As appropriate to the child’s age, ask for their forgiveness.

Advice to those contemplating divorce:

• Those who have the right to end a marriage and remarry: be careful!
• Make all major decisions very slowly.
• Get wise counsel.
• Proceed with care.
• Listen well to a few trustworthy Christian friends.
• Please be careful.

Advice to those who remarry:

• Cultivate your relationship.
• Deepen your love.
• Enjoy your new relationship.

Advice to all Christians:

• Be careful with the counsel you give.

 

Further Resources:

Dr. David’s sermon series “Is Divorce OK?”

Audio CD’s available on in the Foyer of the Auditorium and for free on iTunes and at www.fbcfonthe.net.

Free Marriage Counseling.

Call the church office to schedule an appointment.

Divorce Care beginning in January, 2012

DivorceCare is a friendly, caring group of people who will walk alongside you through one of life’s most difficult experiences. Don’t go through separation or divorce alone.